All posts by Mr. Anonymity

Warning Signs That You Are In A Happy Ending Massage Parlor

Happy Ending Massage parlors are running rampant across every major city. Sex addicts should stay away from all massage parlors period, in early sobriety.

Are you a sex addict looking for a legitimate massage and not a massage with happy ending? Here are some warning signs to determine if you are in a happy ending massage parlor or not.

They’ll ask you if you’ve been there before

If the masseuse asks you if you’ve been there before and you say yes, this gives a signal to the masseuse that she will feel more comfortable asking you if you want a message with happy ending. They will also try and make small talk with you and ask you questions like “No work today?” these are just typical questions a erotic massage masseuse will ask.

There is a fake flower and a pair of boxer shorts on the massage table

The fake flower is very tacky and legitimate massage parlors rarely display them. As you enter the establishment and pay, the Mamasan will direct you to a room with a number on it. Generally, there is a pair of boxer shorts and a fake flower on top of a towel. Dim the lights or turn on the fan if you need to.

Set the fake flower to the side. Put the boxer shorts on. Lay down, and wait for the masseuse. Johns will not put on the boxer shorts and lay naked under the towel. This is a sign to the masseuse that the John wants a rub and tug.

The reviews are on an adult entertainment website and not on yelp

Checking reviews will help you determine whether the massage establishment is legitimate or not. Obviously, if the massage parlor is listed on a site called rubmaps, that should be a clear warning sign that it is a happy ending massage parlor. Google the phone number and see what comes up.

Look for reviews by women

If there are reviews by women than it is very unlikely that the massage parlor is a rub and tug. Only men get erotic massage. Women never do. A women can have sex whenever they want. Another sign the massage is legal is if they mention in their review that they went with their significant other.

They start doing a prostate massage

A legitimate masseuse would never do this. An erotic massage will often consist of a masseuse gliding their hand in the region between the anus and testicles.

As the masseuse performs this erotic massage a john will lift up his legs and put their wait on their elbows and knees so the masseuse has access to their genitals. The masseuse will then reach further in and start rubbing the genitals.

After this is done for a short period of time, the masseuse will tell the John to turn over and start the negotiation for erotic massage.

They are not dressed professionally

If the masseuse is wearing a lot of makeup and a dress then it’s probably a rub and tug. A professional masseuse would be wearing a uniform.

There is a tray full of candy

Rub and tug massage parlors usually have a tray full of candy. This is a common characteristic to watch out for.

Report Human Trafficking

Do you feel you may have a sex addiction? Contact Sex Addicts Anonymous and look for local meeting in your area. Sober coaching is also available.





P411 Escort Advertising Site Is Set To Terminate Ads in Jan 2019

P411 otherwise known as Preferred411 in Jan 2019 will no longer be a place where Johns can look for escorts and book appointments. Another win for FOSTA as the smaller escort advertising sites are starting to feel the heat and shutting down. Other major sites like Slixa and EroticMonkey are still up and new websites are still popping up regardless of the consequences.

Preferred 411 isn’t going to completely shut down. They are still going to help providers as a tool to screen Johns so they feel safe. The faster all of these sites get shut down the better. I hate seeing people in the dark sadistic world of sex addiction and the women that exploit themselves to do this type of work. If sex workers are so concerned about their safety maybe this is a wake up call to stop doing this and take a new direction in life. I’m sure it can be very difficult at first financially but what seems to be a very difficult situation can actually turn out to be a good one.

Application Requirements taken from the P411 website on how to set up and account.

Application Requirements
In order to set up your Preferred411 account you must have at least two recent references from active P411 providers and have a good reputation in the community. An escort can only give you a reference if she has had a private session with you, remembers the meeting clearly, and feels you were “ok”.
If you are guy and you are actually going around getting references so other prostitutes you seriously need to take a look in the mirror and think to yourself “What the fuck am I doing?”
Contact Sex Addicts Anonymous if you feel you have a problem. Sober coaching is also available.








Erotic Monkey and Slixa Escort Advertising Site Still Up As Others Shut Down

The new Fosta Bill?(the Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act) has had a huge impact on the sex worker industry in the United States since going into effect in April, 2018. Most of the main sites that promote prostitution like Backpage, City Vibe, My Red Book, and Humaniplex have either been shut down or had their classified listings shut down. The Erotic Review, and international site where John’s rate and write about their experience with an escort, has shut down all activity within the United States.

The Fosta Bill was designed to prevent websites from facilitating sex trafficking.??The new bill holds website owners legally liable for criminal prosecution for any material promoting prostitution on their platform.?It gives the state attorneys general the power to bring a civil action against websites promoting prostitution.

When FOSTA first took effect, sex workers were expressing concern about their safety since these sites screened Johns. The higher end escorts would ask Johns for personal information and references from other sex workers they’ve seen in the past.? It provided a sense of security for them and made it less likely to get arrested.

The lower end prostitutes that are mainly drug addicts and controlled by pimps were in fear that they’d have to hit the streets because they can no longer advertise online.? The streets are way more dangerous and it is more likely that they can get arrested.

Escorts and Johns have been finding their way around FOSTA. New sites have been popping up that are almost replicas of the major sites that were shut down by the bill.

Some of these sites have been up for a while and others are new. It seems that FOSTA is having trouble enforcing this bill and that “the world’s oldest profession” will not disavow their presence on the internet. Here is a list of escort websites as of 6/3/2018 that are promoting escort and erotic services.



Escort Ads


Erotic Monkey

Adult Search

Girl Directory

Live Escort Reviews




One Back Page

Skip The Games

We have to make sure any and all websites promoting prostitution get shut down. If someone wants to do sex work they should go to certain parts of Nevada where prostitution is legal and where it is done in a safe environment that is regulated by the state which conducts regular tests for sexually transmitted diseases and makes condoms mandatory.

Getting hookers can turn into a dark sadistic addiction. It’s like drug addiction. You obsess over it, spend your money on it, it’s dangerous, makes you feel dirty, and it deters you from having a meaningful relationship. There are many books available that can help with sex addiction.

Breaking the cycle

Sex Addiction 101

Sex Addicts Anonymous

Sober Coaching

Report Human Trafficking


False Evidence Appearing Real – The Power Of Fear On The Mind

False Evidence Appearing Real is a well known acronym in recovery. In reality, fear isn’t actually happening in the present moment. It doesn’t exist.

As Eckhart Tolle, says there is a difference between your life and your life situation. Your life situation may be a mess but do you have what you need in the present moment? Do you have food, clothing, and shelter? Are your thoughts your thoughts or in reality are you just pure consciousness experiencing life. Can you be fully present in the now and enjoy God’s creations?

Could you have very little in the physical world but still be at peace? The answer is yes.

Another acronym for FEAR is Fuck Everything And Run – Well, that’s the reason we turn to addiction. To escape the burdens of life. When your life is falling apart before your very eyes the mental noise can be unbearable. Whether it’s drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling, it’s the only way we can turn off the dysfunctional self talk for some temporary relief. It seemed to work for a while but then it no longer works.

Let’s say you are in a position were you lose your job. Your mind starts projecting into the future. What am I going to do? How am I going to survive and take care of my family? I’m going to end up in the streets and I can’t deal with that. I don’t want to go on anymore. It drives people to the point of insanity and possibly suicide. Alcoholics of a certain variety need to either follow the spiritual path or drink, there is no in between. Many alcoholics wont follow the spiritual path because they can’t open their mind and have faith in a higher power. They are will not’s.

It requires major discipline but you can’t let the ego function control you. The mind is a tool just like the body. The difference is the body works on automation, the mind doesn’t. The mind is a great tool for thinking but other than that it should be turned off.

Be the watcher of your mind and witness how many thoughts are actually productive. As you witness you’ll realize that most thoughts are dysfunctional. Your mind is constantly trying to project fear, anger, jealousy, arrogance, fault finding and judgement of others. When these thoughts come up immediately dismiss them, think about God and become more aware of the present moment. Be of service to others, it gets you out of your head. Do God’s work and stop obsessing on your self. This is what has been working for me.

Fear keeps you from making any progress in your life. My favorite spiritual coach Bob Proctor talks in great detail about overcoming fear. Check out his youtube channel. Bob Proctor Youtube.

Sober Coaching is also available.


Freedom From The Bondage Of Self – The Spiritual Path To Finding God

In my recovery I realized that what is separating me from finding God is my self identity. This false sense of self identity that has been created out of dysfunction and has controlled me my whole life up until now. This self identity that has gripped me with fear, feelings of unworthiness and inferiority to others but at the same time feeling superior to others. It tells me I’m better than or less than you.

The ego is not your amigo. It is what separates me from everybody else. The ego will build a case against anybody. My ego will find fault in you, judge you, pretty much tear you apart in my mind. You can do something I don’t like and that is the end of our relationship and vice versa. I look back and think about all the people that have come and gone throughout my life.

Self will the enemy
My warped thought process is what keeps me from finding God.







In order to form a relationship with God you have to let go of all preconceived ideas, present habits of thought, basically empty your self of self will because it is the self that blocks finding God. It is fear that keeps you from freedom and keeps you remained in bondage. It’s the fear that holds you back from moving forward and enjoying life.

We were all created unique in God’s image. We are each unique in our own way so to judge or find fault in others yourself is disrespecting God. I’m just starting to love myself for the first time in my life.

Sober Coaching

Psychic Change – Living in Peace By Doing the God’s Will

Addiction is a disease of extreme self centeredness. The addict is always pointing the finger at everybody else not aware that they are the problem.

The ego and the mental disease of alcoholism are constantly entering the mental state with dysfunctional thoughts such as resentment, finding fault in others, judging, anger, fear, inpatience, self pity, self delusion, etc. The ego function lives in the past and the future and is in denial of the present moment. You will begin to notice that most dysfunctional thoughts are fear based. Addicts live in fear.

We addicts have created a false sense of identity by believing all our thoughts are actually ours. When you realize they are not your thoughts you can be free from them. You no longer have to live in this false identity and can be free of it. You can begin to have a different perception of reality.

We have to watch our thought stream and when the ego projects a negative thought we have to repudiate it. This is what works for me. I’m fully aware of my thought stream. I don’t entertain negativity. The mind is a tool just like the body. When it isn’t being used it should be set aside. Watch the thoughts and you’ll see that most of them are dysfunctional and not constructive.

We have to be fully immersed in the present moment which is all we really have. When the ego begins to project negative thoughts into your mental state begin to concentrate harder on the present moment. Pay closer attention to your surroundings. Notice the trees, the birds, the sky. Stare in wonder and awe of all creation. Appreciate how amazing everything is. It’s all about shifting your mindset.

By shutting self centeredness out we can begin to think of and help others. You actually get a spiritual high making a difference in someones life. Give thanks and gratitude to God for being. You’ll no longer feel that you need and external possession like a new home or car to fix you. Being at peace is an inside job.

Sober Coaching


Negative self talk- every addict is an extreme example of this

Every person on this planet deals with negative self talk but addicts and alcoholics are extreme examples of listening to it and letting it control them.

We addicts have a fixed alcoholic mind that talks to us with great authority. It cripples us with several different forms of fear. Some if not most of it financial. Not being financially secure and always worrying about money. Money is temporary like everything else. It comes and goes. At one time you could have been making a lot of money and now you aren’t. The problem is you still have to take care of yourself and possibly a family too.

Addicts area also extremely sensitive people. When someone says or does something we don’t like we take it personally. The book the four agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz says don’t ever take anything personally. What that person says has nothing to do with you but everything to do with them. The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom (A Toltec Wisdom Book)

We call this negative self talk the disease of alcoholism. It’s also negative self talk about other people. It judges? and find faults in others. It’ll tell you that that person snubbed you when in reality maybe they didn’t see you and if they did snub you so what? That’s is their alcoholism working in them.

Addicts basically freak out about everything. They can’t live in this world or face it unless they are on something. They just can’t face the music if something bad happens. We think going bankrupt or the IRS taking all of our money is the end of the world.

That’s why a real addict has to open their mind to having a spiritual experience. Addicts can’t let their warped thoughts dictate their life. Maybe they can allow something in that is greater than themselves to take over the warped thinking and not just react to the warped thinking when it comes in. When a thought comes in they must ask themselves. Is that a God Thought or is that my Thought? The fact is if an addict listens to self they are screwed. Instead, they should try the hardest they can to become the person that God wants them to be.

Sober Coaching

What drugs are checked in a 10 panel drug test and how it works

Failing a drug test can cause numerous problems for someone. If you’ve been using you want to make sure it is no longer in your system before the test. Here are some of the reasons while failing a drug test can cause some major problems:

  • Not being able to get a job
  • Losing a job
  • Going back to jail if you are on parole
  • Getting in trouble with your probation officer
  • Not being able to see or have your children

It is highly dangerous for anyone that has a job which operates heavy machinery or drives a vehicle to be under the influence of any drugs or alcohol. They put the safety of themselves and others at risk if they are impaired.

That is why especially in lines of work where peoples lives can be at risk that employers drug test their employees.

Opiates generally last in the urine from three to five days. Marijuana lasts in the urine longer than any other drug. I’ve read that it can last up to three months in urine but in actually, you can test negative for marijuana after thirty days.

The most commonly used 10 panel drug test is the one that is dipped into the urine right after the person being tested has urinated into the cup. It is done right there on the scene, in some rare occurrences it is sent off to the lab for further testing.

Drugs being tested in the ten panel drug test consist of:

  • Amphetamines (Adderall)
  • MDMA (Ecstasy)
  • Cocaine
  • Opiates (including codeine, morphine, oxycontin, vicodin, heroin)
  • PCP (Angel Dust)
  • THC-Marijuana
  • Benzodiazepines (Xanax, Valium)
  • Barbiturates
  • Methadone
  • Propoxyphene
  • Methamphetamine (Speed, Meth, Tweak)

Not all ten panel drug tests test for the exact same things.

Other ones on the market check for Buprenorphine which is found in suboxone. A drug used for those weening off of heroin to help with the withdrawals.

Alcohol saliva test strips

Alcohol is generally tested with a separate test which consist of a swab of the saliva. 5,10,12 panel urine tests typically do not test for alcohol. Drug and alcohol tests are typically done separately. The urine test will be done for the drugs and the saliva test will be done for the alcohol. Buy 10 One Step Alcohol Saliva Test Strip Pack For Only $14.95

Adderall Drug Test

Adderall is a tricky one. Several psychiatrists are prescribing Adderall to people that suffer from ADHD to help them focus and concentrate. However, it is an amphetamine and will show up as one on a ten panel drug test. It’s kind of a gray area. You maybe prescribed the drug by a doctor but that doesn’t mean that it will be ok with an employer if you are on it.

Cost of 10 panel drug test

You can buy a 10 panel drug test on Amazon for only $5.49. It’s the kind that you dip into urine. Buy the ten panel drug test on Amazon for only $5.49.

Sober Coaching

What is detected on a 12 panel drug test and why would you take it?

A? standard 12 panel drug test kit is for the detection of marijuana, cocaine, opiates (heroin, morphine, opium, smack), amphetamine (Adderall, Dexedrine, speed, uppers), methamphetamine (crank, ice, crystal meth), benzodiazepines (xanax, valium), barbiturates, phencyclidine (PCP), ecstasy, oxycodone (Percocet, Percodan, OxyContin, Vicodin), methadone, and buprenorphine.

The twelve panel drug test is the most thorough drug test because it can test for extended opiates and the misuse of prescription painkillers like Percocet, Vicodin, and Lortab that would not show up on a test with fewer panels.

The hair follicle drug test can detect drugs up to the longest duration. Other drug tests include saliva and blood but urine is the most common because it is the easiest and the least expensive.

There are many reasons why you should take a drug test. Maybe your employer has a drug testing policy and could test you soon, or maybe you’re being considered for a job and a pre‐employment drug test is needed. They might also perform tests because an employee appears to be under the influence of drugs or alcohol on the job, if unexcused absence from work or lateness is an issue, or if performance appears to be impacted by drug or alcohol abuse. What ever the case may be you have to find out if you test positive.

Order a 12 Panel Drug Test Cup with BUP Testing Instantly for 12 Different Drugs

Having trouble staying sober. Sober coaching.




Addicted to prostitutes – Addicts may transfer one addiction to another

Some alcoholics that get sober will transfer their disease to another addiction like sex, food, or gambling. They justify their new addiction in their heads due to the fact that they aren’t using drugs and alcohol and they need at least something to check out.

What happens is some alcoholics get “dry” meaning the they put the plug in the jug but they haven’t had a change of character and they don’t work the twelve steps. They don’t live their lives on a spiritual path and still have the same old dysfunctional behavior. Sex addiction like pornography can get way out of hand like drug and alcohol abuse, the consequences could easily get worse.

Do prostitutes enjoy sex?

I highly doubt that any prostitute enjoys selling their body for sex. Most prostitutes in the United States are doing it either because they are a drug addict or someone is forcing them to do it.

Prostitutes in third world countries do it more so do to poverty and men from the United States go over to these poor countries and exploit that. Sex tourism is popular among men in places like Thailand, The Dominican Republic, and Costa Rica.

Where do sex addicts find prostitutes?

Prostitutes are mainly found online on sites like the erotic review, backpage, cityvibe, and humaniplex. The biggest one out there is the erotic review. My red book was another big escort review site but that one got shut down. Backpage was forced to shut down their erotic services section but all the prostitutes moved over to the women seeking men section and are still advertising and doing the exact same thing that got the erotic services section shut down.

Many of these web sites have reviews on prostitutes that potential clients can read. Going to see a prostitute can be dangerous. Someone could be waiting in the closet and jump out and rob a John or the prostitute could be an under cover cop. That’s why these internet review sites have grown so much in popularity. These Johns feel more comfortable seeing a prostitute with good reviews because they feel that they’ll be safe and not get ripped off or get arrested.

They also can read about the prostitute’s performance and if their pictures are accurate. They have a better idea of knowing what kind of situation they are getting into.

Scouring the internet shopping for prostitutes can be an addiction in itself like watching pornography and can take up a lot of time. It’s a way to check out from reality just like drinking or doing drugs.

It’s not only the act of having the sex that is appealing to the sex addict but actually going to see and have sex with a complete stranger can get the adrenaline pumping. Just like with drugs. It’s not only the act of doing the drugs but going to get them in a seedy neighborhood and possibly getting ripped off. It’s the dangerous act around actually doing the intended act.

Stopping sex addiction

stopping sex addiction is like stopping any other addiction like drugs or alcohol. You first have to admit that you have a problem and that your life is unmanageable. Then you need to get help. If you decide to get help and start to experience a change in character you will no longer be interested in just the animalistic act of sex with a prostitute and will instead desire to have a meaningful relationship. This is what happens when addicts start to grow spiritually, they change.

You will need help and you could use the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous and apply it to sex addiction. Just switch the word alcohol for sex. Most programs use the twelve steps but there are other programs out there that are more like group therapy and don’t come from a spiritual perspective. Any real addict needs help from a power greater than themselves because their mind is warped and they can’t do it on their own.

Reach out for help, get a sponsor, start going to meetings. A real addict can’t do it on their own and live a happy and joyous life. There are also plenty of books out there to help you on your journey other than the big book. Check out Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved. There are plenty of different books on Amazon. These are meant to be suggestions.